why i'm pathetic

i might get a dog tomorrow. i'm going to beat the crowds to petsmart to meet him. that's the goal anyway.

but i'm dreading tonight. for reasons that are hard for me to comprehend. and to process. and to figure out. and to come to terms with. i'm being vague, i know. but there's just some internal switch in me that gets pulled to depression mode when it's a beautiful day, and a beautiful night and when i know i'll be spending it solo. you know, there's plenty i "want" to do. but i don't jam so much with hanging out in public by myself on a friday night. so yeah, i guess i'll just give into the temporary depression that plagues me. i hate it. like really, really, really hate it.

i need to get out of this rut. any suggestions? maybe i should eat some bacon.

but, tomorrow i have things to do. like drop a car of in lawrence for a ride back from brew to brew. and i have to dog shop. and clean a little. and then, there's the ku game that i'll watch. but i may silently be routing for north carolina. i'm sorry. it's just in my nature to not route for ku. even when i want to disown mu. at least their basketball team anyway.