and then it happens. i drift. my body feels lighter. my mind wanders into subconsciousness. and just as i'm about to be really, truly alseep, something moves and i'm awake again. only this time, more awake. i have to get up and go to the bathroom. i need water then. and advil. and well hell, since i'm up, i check my email. i use my back massager, i update my facebook status. i sit. and then, it's 5 a.m. and i only have two more hours of sleep left anyway. and my body says "no." and my mind is tense. really tense. so tense that i have to talk to someone about it. now. so i do.
and it helps. some.
but then as the day goes on. and the tiredness becomes almost too much to bare, everything suddenly seems more complicated and sad and emotional and this ache creeps in. and all i really want to do is take a nap.