i know this is illogical, but whatever. (of course i spit the gum out before walking into the agency.)
and right now. all this fog and ugliness outside. instead of getting totally depressed, i'm all "hey, it's sorta like vacationing in seattle without spending any money."
which brings me to where i really need to find the bright side. this employment (or lack thereof) situation.
let's refresh. i lost my job in march. in the summer, i began a contract at sprint. i did that for two months. then nothing until i landed a couple freelance clients. then nothing until i landed a temporary employment gig at the agency of my dreams. which was awesome. but, has sadly, come to an end. note the primary word "temporary."
so now i'm back where i started. except i'm not. because here are the bright sides i'm forcing myself to see:
1. i am now much more connected to the advertising community here than i ever was before.
2. i have met some amazing, talented, creative people. who i will continued to stay in touch with.
3. the temporary thing could turn into a permanent thing. just not right now.
4. hey, i can start running a lot again.
5. this year has forced me to become creative in ways to sell my skills. my direct mail postcards won something at the Addys. i'm proud of this. because i did them on my own (with B as my art director.)
6. my floors (and counters and clothes and tables and windows) will all be really clean again.
still there is the overwhelming feeling of needing to have steady income, and steady co-workers and a desk in an office and work that makes me feel like my life is worth something.
which is probably where all of this thinking is wrong. life is not about what you do for a living. and anyway, yeah. trying to get there.