Running crazy

I don’t know what I was thinking. I thought training for a half marathon would be easy. I think I forgot that I would be training in hot and humid Kansas City and I’m not sure I knew just how badly sweat in the eyes stings. Maybe I should buy a sweatband, but I don’t want to look silly. It’s all about fashion, really, which is why I never where matching running outfits and why by the end of my run, my bangs are matted to my forehead and the rubber bands securing my pigtails are plumped full of salty, disgusting sweat. Honestly, I don’t understand why running tanks come in any color other than black. Black hides sweat stains and moisture, hot pink does not. And I know that after mile 8 when I’m looking hot and bothered with flushed cheeks and glistening skin, the last thing I need is to draw attention to my sweat-covered running tank. So, I stick with black. — even if it’s not the exact same shade of black as my running shorts. It irks me at first, but I figure I’d be more self conscious parading my sweat rings than not matching my blacks. Hard core running does not require cutesy little running outfits, but some people just don’t get it. Just the other day at the gym, I witnessed a tan, big-chested blond shaking what God gave her on the treadmill. She had poured herself into a bright green running tank and pink shorts and honestly, looked kind of silly. But, the guys loved it because they kept looking and talking to her and she didn’t seem to mind. I, however, don’t like to talk when I’m running because it give me cramps, which I’m not sure is a great sign of my conditioning efforts, but cramps are no fun and so, I keep my headphones on and my eyes forward. And I try not to compare myself to the bombshell on the treadmill to my left, which is another reason why I do most of my training outside even though the air is thick and muggy and uncomfortable. Outside, there is no mirror in front of me, no television displaying images from The Real World and no double d’s threatening to bounce there way over to my direct line of vision. I’ve also heard the rumor that during the actual race, the ground will not be moving beneath me and there will be no temperature-controlled environment surrounding me like a bubble. So, I think I’ll buy a sweatband and stick to the outdoors. I wonder what color will best match my eyes….